In ancient India, parents fixed arranged marriages for their children ensuring that there is an age gap of at least 10 years in the couple. Not just grandparents, even your parents might agree, if you ask. In western countries, age is never a concern. While some women marry men of the same age, others marry men who are much older or even younger to them. But, in India, it is mandatory to follow the age difference while seeking alliance. Why is that so?
Even in love marriages, many women prefer marrying men who are older to them with a significant age difference. Is it some trend or does it hold any significance? “I just fell in love with him, only later did I know the age difference. Even though he is 12 years older to me, it doesn’t matter. It’s love, you know” says, Shripa Mehta, 27. While some women claim it as love others feel secure with an older man beside them.
On being asked why they preferred marrying men who are much older to them, here are some reasons that women commonly agreed to.
“I feel secure”
According to medical science, women mature faster than men of their age. Therefore, women prefer marrying older men as they are emotionally stable when compared to men of the same age. Moreover, “Why would I marry a guy of my age who is constantly changing his jobs rather than an older man who is financially stable and secure?” says Revathi Menon, 26, a KPO executive.
“He understands me better”
“My college boyfriend was immature. Every single time, I had to overtly tell him about how I feel. But, today, I am married to a man who is 7 years older to me. He understands me better. He is mature and sensitive and knows me. And I like that about him,” declares Priyanka Dalal, a content writer. While men take time to develop sensitivity, women tend to choose older men who already possess those qualities.
“He is the fun type”
Older men are well aware of the worldly events and can possess offbeat information that younger men could lack. Therefore, women tend to like men who speak such interesting things rather than falling for a same aged man who can be quite mushy and juvenile in his talks. “I was approached by this random man once at the bar who asked me my birthday month. I told him July. His reply to it is the reason why we are happily married for 13 years now. He said that the first letters of the months July through November spell JASON (November being his birthday month and Jason, his name) and gave me a handshake with the perfect introduction. Isn’t that cute and funny?” laughs Amanda, mother of two adorable girls.
“I feel stable and calm”
“Having seen life with more experience than me, he is very stable with his thought processes. It helps me stay calm when I am stressed out,” says Kavya Ramesh, who is happily married for five years now. Women feel that men who are older tend to develop steadiness and calmness over the years and that they can handle hassles at ease.
“I don’t have to worry about him cheating”
While younger men are busy looking for flings and not-so-serious relationships, older men seek stability and long term relationships (at least most of them do). This quality in them attracts women easily. “Everyday at sharp 6 pm, he is at home. He loves to spend time with the kids. I don’t even have to worry about him cheating on me when he is so dedicated to his family values,” admits Shreya Agarwal, a fitness trainer.
At the end of the day, love is love. Age is never a barrier.