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More often than not, a shockingly large number of people do not know how to take a compliment well. I wonder, why does this happen! I mean… to be honest… if I were to receive a compliment from my crush, I’d go pink in the cheeks and say, ‘Awww, thank you so much!’ and I’d land straight on cloud 9. But I’ve noticed it with so many people that whenever they get a compliment, they get extremely fidgety and don’t appreciate it.
I guess there’s just something going on in their mind that tells them they cannot possibly deserve positive feedback regarding anything related to them. And therefore, the person complimenting them must either be lying, or feeling sorry for them. This pessimistic, critical voice in their heads makes them reject the compliment, and in turn undermine the person who complimented them in the first place.
Also read: How to earn respect in social situations
If you’re among those few who find it difficult to take a compliment, don’t fret. It’s never too late to come out of the cocoon and feed our self-confidence. Think of all the good you would bring on yourself if you easily accepted compliments. You would strengthen relationships, promote achievements and spread smiles. After all a compliment is like a gift; and turning down a gift is like insulting a person who values you, thereby suggesting that you don’t value them enough.
If you want to learn to take a compliment well, here are a few tips to get you started.
Stop putting yourself down: One common reaction that people (who don’t take a compliment well) give, implies that they don’t deserve it – “No, it’s not me really, it’s the haircut”. Stop doing that! You don’t need to give reasons for receiving positive feedback. So if you’re told you look good, it doesn’t have to be the dress, or the haircut but the confidence you wear along with those things.
Avoid deviating compliments to others: If you receive a compliment on your face, you do not need to deflect it to others all the time. Sure, they may be deserving of the compliment too, but so are you.
Don’t put off the compliment directly: Putting off a compliment directly is extremely insulting to the person who appreciated you. Avoid phrases like “No, it’s nothing great” or “I just did what I had to do”. It can put the other person down.
Claiming it was ‘luck’: Stop throwing the luck card all the time. Efforts are a big thing, luck only plays a 50% role in any achievement.
Own your accomplishments: Every time you achieve success or you manage to do something praiseworthy, it doesn’t need to be attributed to ‘luck’. Start acknowledging your accomplishments and take responsibility of successes as well as failures.
Appreciate the compliment: No matter who gives you a compliment and no matter how big or small it is, always appreciate it. Don’t put it down or reject it.
Recognize your contribution: At times, you may not be the only one who deserves a compliment on a job well done collectively in a group. But realize that you too were a part of the group, so don’t say things like “Mark and Preeti deserve all the credit”. Instead, say something like, “Thank you, I’m sure Mark and Preeti would love to hear that too!”
Be gracious: Giving a compliment isn’t always easy for the other person, so be grateful that a person has offered you one. Accept it gracefully by saying “Thank you” and appreciate it.
That’s how easy it is!